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Earlier this month, we wrote about the importance of behaving in a straightforward and consistent manner when telling your spouse that you want a divorce. But what if you do not want a divorce? What if you are grappling with the frustrating and deeply sad reality that your spouse wants a divorce? It is important that you take certain steps in reaction to this news, even if you are so stunned and overwhelmed that your feet seem to be rooted to the floor.

Thankfully, even if you do not feel that you can process this news completely right now, you can enlist professionals to help you move forward with actions that you cannot yet wrap your head around. For example, it is important to speak with an attorney sooner rather than later. Failure to speak with an attorney as soon as you know that your spouse wants a divorce can result in numerous negative consequences, depending on your circumstances. Meeting with a financial planner and a counselor may benefit you as well.

Chances are that your divorce process will take many months. Even if your divorce is straightforward, uncontested and amicable, state laws will likely ensure that several months will pass before you can have your divorce finalized. During this time, you will need to make a host of decisions about your living arrangements, your property, your children (if applicable) and your future. However, the first thing you need to do is to call an attorney. Even if you cannot fathom making these other choices, please take the time to choose an attorney who seems like a good fit for you. The rest of the process will progress in time once you take this first step.

Source: The Huffington Post, “My Wife Filed for Divorce! Now What?” Jackie Philossoph, Aug. 15, 2014